Sunday, September 18, 2011

Philanthropic Touts- Beware!!

This is an oxymoron.Aint it?
A tout and philanthropic!!!
Yes, there are a few special ones.

It was August 2010.
My first PG accommodation in Gurgaon closed down.
All the PGs were asked to vacate on a short notice of 15 days.
The keeper recommended another sister concern.

I moved into the new place.
I had to compromise on my privacy.
Same money but one more occupancy.
I maintained my rapport with the old guy.
He was happy thinking he was able to help.
We went out for footloose and even footsie.
He could not interest me beyond a few public outings.
Things came to a standstill.

I met the new landlords.
Thank god,they were old.
They showed me a low cost room.
I was steered away to a high cost room the very next day.
For the one which I was showed,there lived a girl in it.
She was average built,wore old bright clothes on her dark skin.
Her skin lacked luster.
She had a scar right below her neck.
He cleavage was marked by that wound.
It was mark of burnt patch of dead skin.
She rarely combed her hair.
She was always caught out-of-bed types.
She asked just too many questions from everyone.
She made friends with every new comer.
Every new comer will phone anti the third day.
That girl was considered an anathema.
She had been asked to vacate many times.
Not even a single time she said she will not.
Since,it had no end.
I stayed in another room like a refugee.
I bated my breath in anticipation and trepidation.

Nothing moved.Everything was still.
The spell broke and the girl screamed.
That room was permanently betrothed to her.
I was nobody but just a weakling.
Days past in thinking.
Their philanthropy made me an altruist.
I squeezed myself into the new room.

Anti wanted more butter.
She asked me to pay more.
This room was better for her.
I said I m sorry.
Milk of kindness showered -
When I said, "I am a teacher".
She implored,"Then Attend to my son's academic features ".
I ordered , '' Bring his books".
The son was moved.
He said, "I am too old and sexy for a tuition".
So was I - too young & appealing for an honorary affectation.
Nothing moved.

I stayed here in this room.
No room mate lasting not more than a season.
The room gave them every reason
What was right about this room in precision?
I repaired the door.
Then the cupboard.
Then I put a mirror.
I changed the curtains.
I went to office late just because the maid would never make it on time.
When the room smelt of damp air from the desert cooler.
I changed the walls of cooler.
I put the first bulb in the socket.
I got the tube lights changed.
I sprayed the room freshener.
I brought the first mosquito repellent.
I decorated the place.
I thought, I owned it now.
I had a nice reputation at the place.
I felt like a princess.
I was resourceful and accommodating.
Now room mates stayed for longer.
I was requested to help the case of others.
I became the negotiator.

The pg was my home.
I thought I could live here forever.

I did not relocate when my work place changed.
The other provisional things did come off.
I went on replacing them.

Just today, I felt like an adventurous nomad once again.
I returned to my room to find two new faces.
A girl and her mother.
Antie said -
You are the sweetest girl to me.
And had an extra bed take away my peace of mind.

Her philanthropy means my altruism.
This time something is going to move.
This time - it will be me.
Touts will be touts!!!
Philanthropic touts...
They pay no tax.
Tax in on the inmates.
They save electricity bills by cutting out the main supply.
They say that they save enough for Earth hour.
Touts O touts!
You philanthropic touts!
They block the washing machine.
They say girls do not know the right use.
One can of milk is equivalent to two teaspoonfuls of milk.
Lunch is not laid,because no one is at home in the noon.
Those who are,they do not count.
Tout o tout!
Thou,philanthropic tout.

Shout,we will shout-
U malevolent, manipulative,lazy bums growing fat on sprouts!!!
To hell with your CSR,
Embittered our PR.
The bugbear was just a misnomer.
You used her for her dumbness.
To entice people to her room.
Just to arrange them like sacks of golds,
In your stored sans nuts and bolts.
Arse of a rat to you-you, 'philanthropic touts'!

At other places I am aware I have seen worse.
People make sections of wood.The cup boards are open and not on wall.
The cupboards are on floor.
Not clothes but girls stay in them.
Good-bad-virgins-married all types.
Touts say that they have provided them with
Food,Security and Shelter.
Philanthropy in this age is merely a 'euphemism'.
Neither is my tale any less than a hyperbole,
if I say that I would give up first.
I will make it a chapter of an adulterated history ".
If you are thinking of any such business;
Beware!! You might get PG bugger bloggers like me.