Sunday, April 7, 2013

The rain of July

Legend has it - The monsoon in India.

The hide and seek it plays,
The evasive, pervasive it stays.

Too much rain is flood.
Too little is famine.

I miss that Rain.
Its redolence fills me with memories unbound.

Feelings of consummation, fulfillment and loss.
Feelings of hope, sorrow and death.

Weather Forecast works harder year by year
No measure of speculation has ever been clear.

I miss that rain.
Folk lore sings its story.

Once the Sky and the Earth were in love.
They were separated.

Each time, the sky weeps- it rains.
The Sky reaches the Earth through its tears.

The Earth gets wet.
The Sky and the Earth embrace each other that way.

The Sun then graces the scene.
There's a rainbow.

I miss that rainbow.
That which colored my life.

Horizon is distant away.
It is a distant hope.

I wet my eyes.
I feel the pain.
That rain which cleansed me,
That rain which soiled my ground.
That rain which left me more thirsty as it quenched my thirst.
Who was more unworthy?
I leave the taste of bitter sweet behind.
Nothing quenched my thirst as did it.
The possession of which arched my brow.
In the deepest part of my my heart.
It lives there.

It still continues to rain.
The tear collects at the corner of my eyes.

The water that flushes the bad.
Buffaloes in ponds and children gambol in pits.

The fries for snacks.
The newness that vegetation reflects.

Then the pining of lovers.
The tale of which fills me with awe.

A personal account of which confuses me.
Just as much as it refuses to leave me.

The rain that dropped by my door last July.
The clouds of which still hover my sky.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Friends with Benefit : Revisited

Friend : (Excited) Hey u know what! The guy the other day asked me for a date ?
Me: ( Double excited) Vow, the same you had a crush on?
Friend: ( Blushing with her nostrils swelling )Yeah!
Me: ( Enjoying the moment )So where?
Friend : ( Hesitating )He said the best place is his. He said : tomorrow evening is the last class. So we should catch up. We can drink and talk at ease.

Me: ( protective of my young friend but afraid of sounding conservative )The first date! But you have no experience with drinks.
Friend :( With doubled hesitation) Yah, I want to try it sometime. But I am not so sure.
Me : ( Extending my best self, despite oath of sobriety but afraid of too much intrusion) Well, try it with people you know. We''ll gang up!
Friend : ( With eyes lighting up with hope ) Yeah, I always want that.
Me : ( Proselytizing )Ask the guy for a date outside. Keep it short for its the first time. How about getting to know each other better first.
Friend : ( Does not want to lose this opportunity, yet not letting her intelligence die ) The classes are over. We do not have time. He told me not to mention the offer to anybody else at the class.
Me : Either he is ahead of time or Do not we get the point baby!

Next day -
A geek to me : Hey would you care to be my friend with benefit?
Me : ( To myself ) Is he going to offer me some business ?
He : Say...
Me : No answer
He : ...
Me : No answer

Followed by a post lol

Action ( Actually Reaction )

LOVELESSSEX is like getting a degree by bribing coz 'They' wanted it ha ha. It's like knowing a woman in bed coz I was not sure. It's like bearing with a man coz I wanted to be sure. It's like repeat attempts on a certain posture coz The porn stars seem to pretend to or enjoy it on screen. We do so many things such perfunctorily.

We often forget what what we want the most is the FREEDOM 'to be ourselves'. When we reduce LOVEMAKING to temporary witchcraft ( ha ha), affair, fling, a one night thing, behind the bush story, on the first date in the care, at a hotel room once, or even smarter terms like 'friends with benefit' and the worst RAPE, do we realise how small we become and how step by step we kill our conscience and proceed towards a slow miserable death - even before the death that could liberate us from being what 'They' made us.

How WE become a part of 'They'...if you give time to that, you are certainly a better being...Love making should always have LOVE in it...wait for the right one and if you already have someone, think of how to make it right first and how to keep it right..what say you ?

Epilogue :

I watched the movie Friends with benefit a month later. I loved it. However, still everything I watch or read I understand I can not apply in every context. India still has a very different culture. We are not afraid of what the people say. We are afraid of what loss it would be to invest emotions and energy in someone who does not have enough mettle to sustain it. Neither are we often so sure of ourselves.

We often continue to take chances and make same mistakes...